Hi again everybody, I’m Ivy.
I wasn’t really sure what to talk about and so a while ago I wrote this bot called Bots r cool to try to figure out why we all like bots, and this presentation is the top 20 of those off of Favstar plopped into OutSlide because I really just didn’t want to do any work at all.
“Bots are cool because it can be interpreted differently by everyone depending on your perspective and beliefs.”
This slide actually makes me want to hook up a bot to CAD or something, have it dump random shapes into my living room, or something.
“Bots are cool because sometimes they decide to take a second out of their day and compliment you and that’s pretty awesome.”
Maybe it’s just a message from a ghost, or a pseudo-random number generator in the sky.
“Bots are cool because you freaking love EDM.”
There are bots that live only to connect people with common interests, like all of us here.
“Bots are cool because they have to look up a lot of slang words on Urban Dictionary.”
We can send bots to places too hostile for humans, such as the Mariana Trench, Mars, or 4chan.
“Bots are cool because they’re in a band, it will probably mean free concert tickets.”
I’m really excited about bots who make [inaudible]. I hope they’ll exist soon.
“Bots are cool because *gets distracted looking at butts*”
“This bot is cool because she stimulates me creatively. I could write 20 albums right now. I fuckin love her dawg.”
Sometimes bots make too little sense to paint a a whole picture for you. Your brain can go through a whole bunch of possibilities to interpret nonsense or connect juxtaposed bits.
“Bots are cool because they damn sure did just go there.”
“This bot is cool because you still taste dirt for hours after it’s over!”
Sometimes lack of context is the best part.
“Bots are cool because it’s their job, and they take it seriously.”
Bots can carry long arguments with very angry folks and never break character. I was going to say without being rude, but Olivia.
“This bot is cool because I do not love you,?”
Bots can deviate from their creators’ intent and evoke unexpected emotions in readers.
“Bots are cool because we can look lively but be dead inside.”
Bots have feelings primarily so they can lie about them.
“This bot is cool because of the informality! We brainstorm and work towards creativity together.”
“Bots are cool because they miss you.”
…if you program them to.
“This bot is cool because one time its dress flew up and an old lady said ‘at lest you have cute undies.’”
All bots have cute undies.
“Bots are cool because you don’t have to keep up with them and if you don’t like it you can just cut your hair shorter.”
Most technical problems can be solved with half a bottle of gin and a pair of scissors.
“Bots are cool because they don’t actually NEED you but you can give it love and be its mama and it will want you.”
“Bots are cool because they am cool.”
“This bot is cool because it’s cool guys.”
And that’s it for me.
Darius Kazemi's home page for Bot Summit 2014, with YouTube links to individual sessions, and a log of the IRC channel.