I went about work­ing out why it was that lit­tle Aboriginal girls could say they were boss for them­selves. And what it meant to be inde­pen­dent and self-determining. But I also real­ized that to live in an Aboriginal com­mu­ni­ty was to be embed­ded and nest­ed in a con­stant set of rela­tion­ships and respon­si­bil­i­ties, and you could be boss for your­self, but only if you were also respect­ful of your rela­tion­ships and your respon­si­bil­i­ties and your oblig­a­tions.